Maybe You Should Just Shut Up and Protect Your Dreams in Silence

I have been thinking about the way I am with others and the way I am with myself. I feel like I can never be truly myself with others. Like I have to suppress a little of myself to fit in with their personalities. Then, I realized that it might not be a bad thing after all. Maybe I’d like to keep some of my interests only to myself.

Everyone has their own hobbies, their own obsessions, and their own small ideas. We all have rituals and habits that make us who we are, that make us unique. And no matter how similar you think you are to your friends, there are parts of you and things that you enjoy that seem so different from others’ interests. That’s the beauty of being yourself, with your own little interests. No one will ever feel the way that you do, and no one will ever experience certain emotions the way that you do. I believe that even though we share some closeness with the people that we love, we are only truly ourselves when we are alone and indulging in our own hobbies and silly little interests.

After a while, and growing more into my 20s, I realized I’d like to keep some things sacred and dear to my heart. I’d like to keep parts of myself only to myself, leaving no one space to ruin or spoil the way I perceive myself. We always feel the need to share everything about ourselves; good and bad. We share because we want validation; we want someone to tell us that we are doing something right and that we are making the right decisions all the time. But some things should remain for yourself only. Things that bring you happiness and comfort. After a lot of oversharing and trying to convince people why I like certain interests and hobbies, I finally understood that not everything and not every achievement should be shared with others, even the people you love. Because not everyone will feel the same way that you do about certain things.

They say people can’t ruin what they don’t know, and I really do believe that. People can’t ruin the things that make you happy if they don’t know about them. They can’t ruin the way you feel when you are practicing the hobbies that bring you comfort and wash away your anxiety. They can’t bring you down when you feel good about an achievement. Some things are meant to be celebrated by you only.

It does not mean that you should keep everything to yourself; just the things that are special and mean a lot to you. There are things that you could consider a great success, things that make you feel fulfilled, but that wouldn’t mean much to them. When you stop sharing those things, you protect yourself from people bringing you down, from them making you feel like you are not good enough.

Oversharing your dreams and ambitions will ultimately drain you. It is an inevitable feeling. When you constantly go around sharing the things that you want to achieve, you open yourself up to a lot of opinions and criticism. Everyone suddenly has a say in your life and thinks they are entitled to one. Some dreams should remain private until they come true.

Your ambitions and dreams should be treated like something sacred, something that should be protected from others’ opinions and thoughts. The things you dream of achieving, and the progress you keep making toward those things, should be for your own satisfaction. Those things are ways to prove to yourself that you are capable of being successful in your own way. It’s not about pleasing others or proving to anyone that you are good enough. We need to get out of the habit of telling people our goals before we actually achieve anything, because this only gives us a sense of reward that doesn’t really exist yet. And our dreams become something we need to prove to other people. So instead of pursuing the things we actually want, we pursue others’ validation and applause. We focus on the need to prove them wrong, and we neglect the goals we set for ourselves.

When we tell people our ambitions, or any idea that we might have for our future, we trap ourselves in a reward cage where we need constant validation and hear endless criticism. And the energy we should pour into our goals is already wasted on talking about those dreams and trying to convince people why we have them. It is merely a waste of time. Your energy should be reserved for you and the things you truly want. Sometimes, when you share your enthusiasm about your dreams with the wrong people and that enthusiasm is not reciprocated, you end up feeling defeated. It makes you feel like those dreams don’t mean much, even though they mean the world to you. Talking about your dreams as though they already came true can give you a false sense of achievement and make you less inclined to do anything about them. Negative comments and harsh criticism can even stop you from beginning at all.

When the world is draining and things feel out of control, you can always come back to yourself.

There’s so much peace in protecting your hobbies and interests from the outside world.

Your dreams, goals, and ambitions should sometimes be a secret that only you know. And the progress you make should be done discreetly, with no eyes to judge it. When you keep your goals to yourself, you stay motivated to achieve them. But when you tell them to others, you trap yourself into trying to prove to them that you can succeed.

Some parts of yourself are meant to be for you only. These parts are what make you who you are, free of judgement and external validation. Keep bits of yourself only to yourself. Not everybody needs to know the things that bring you happiness or your daily rituals of comfort. It doesn’t mean that everybody is out to get us, it’s just that we care so much about external comments that we can begin limiting ourselves because of them.

Some things about us need to stay private. They need to stay private because they are special and they mean something to us. They don’t have to mean something to others. What matters is that you care about it, and that is why you need to protect it. Not everyone deserves to be a part of your journey, and not everybody should have full access to you. Working in silence will benefit you more than anything ever will.