Why Is Everyone So Afraid of Being Cringe? Tanner Devore Thinks He Knows Why.

Some conversations stay with you long after they end. What began as a discussion about comedy, content creation, and Tanner Devore's viral video The Whimsy Decline: The Rise of Digital Conservatism quickly unfolded into something much bigger: a conversation about what the internet is quietly taking from us. Somewhere between algorithms, irony, and the fear of looking "cringe," many of us have become increasingly hesitant to express joy, take creative risks, or simply allow ourselves to be seen. But Tanner offers a different perspective, one that embraces vulnerability over performance, curiosity over perfection, and genuine human connection over digital validation.

Throughout our conversation, we spoke about growing up in a small town, building a creative life on your own terms, dating in the age of Instagram, and why perhaps the bravest thing you can do today isn't to reinvent yourself, but to stop being afraid of becoming who you've always wanted to be.

“I don’t think it’s cringe to be happy or to chase something that feels right to you. You’re also allowed to just do things for a season. If you’ve always wanted to be blonde, girl go blonde.” - Tanner Devore

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: So, I wanted to just start off by thanking you for coming to this interview, but also just because I watch your content. I love it and I’ve kind of been on a kick of watching all of your Youtube videos and The Tangent Podcast. 

TANNER DEVORE: I appreciate it. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: It’s really the type of work that everyone needs to be seeing right now, honestly, with everything going on. You know, no one needs another try on haul or something, you know? 

TANNER DEVORE: No, literally. Literally. I feel like I have so many discussions with people where they’re just like, ‘I just want to not think or if I do, I want it to be good thinking, like uphill thinking.’ That’s so real because I get so mad at my phone all the time. Just over the dumbest stuff, you know what I mean? I literally am always on X. I want to create stuff that’s calming people down a bit. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: Absolutely. So, I wanted to start off by talking about your background. I know you grew up in a smaller Illinois town and you’ve previously said theater was an outlet for you. I also grew up in a smaller town, so I wanted to ask you if you feel like growing up in a smaller place helped you be more creative in some ways or if you feel like that environment might have held you back from expressing your creativity earlier on?

TANNER DEVORE: I think so much of my creating was done in isolation. Not because I didn’t feel safe, but just because I didn’t see a lot of people doing it out loud, you know? So much of my brainstorming and my ideas were done behind closed doors, like in my bedroom as a kid. I’m really grateful that I had a safety net that I could kind of create at home and then I’d just be normal at school, you know? Finding theater was definitely one of the first times that I was able to do what I was doing in my bedroom on a public school platform. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: Definitely, I feel you on that. Within your household, do you feel like you grew up with comedy, or do you feel like you moved into the role of being the comic relief? 

TANNER DEVORE: I think at home, it was always that people would rather laugh about something frustrating versus getting mad. That’s very helpful until you need to be taken seriously about something you’re upset about. It’s a good problem to have. I feel like so much of your emotions get turned to being funny. At school and stuff, I think I always try and lighten the mood or be kind of like the class clown figure. I never realized that’s not everybody’s coping mechanism. I try and surround myself with a lot of people that jump to being funny about things instead of dwelling too much on it. But I do understand that that’s not everybody’s coping mechanism. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: Would that be an avenue that led you to creating content? How did that come about?

TANNER DEVORE: I think I’m really obsessed with being my own boss. So as I was auditioning, trying out for shows and musicals and plays, I would really have to hyper extend myself to feel like I could perform. I was trying to perform in the lens that I was always told I needed to perform in. I think when I started making content, I realized that it felt super easy opposed to trying to fit everyone else’s mold. I got to do my own sense of comedy no matter how stupid that was or how easy that was or how low budget that was. It didn’t matter. It was just a very quick and easy and on my own terms thing. I think that’s what attracted me to it. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: Absolutely. You rose to fame from these early, really funny videos and now that you have The Tangent Podcast, you have both sides of addressing serious topics and emotions and then giving that outlet to other people so that they can laugh if they don’t want to focus on some of the hard times. How do you find the balance between addressing these two things?

TANNER DEVORE: I think for a lot of years in my life, like I was saying about comedy being a coping mechanism, there’s a lot of escapism I think. I feel like I’m at a place now that I can revisit so many emotions from my life and tackle it with a bit of, ‘It’s okay to cry a little bit and the laugh at how ridiculous you look crying.’ I think it’s kind of the way I look at it. I think comedy has opened me up where I’m good being vulnerable and being seen. But I didn’t realize that I can be seen for other things than just being the funny guy. I think it’s been very helpful to use that comfort of being laughed at and viewed and seen to being viewed looking at times that maybe aren’t funny. That’s been a big goal with the pod. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: Absolutely. So that brings me to The Whimsy Decline: The Rise of Digital Conservatism. I watched that in the middle of the night when I couldn’t sleep. I was sitting in my room, and I was just so struck by what you were saying. I just thought it was so beautiful. I cried with you and I just appreciate so much that you do feel comfortable enough to share everything that’s on your mind because you’re speaking really to what so many people are feeling or what so many people have been through. One part of that video that really stuck with me was when you said, ‘I don’t think it’s cringe to be happy or to chase something that feels right to you. You’re allowed to just do things for a season. If you’ve always wanted to go blonde, girl, just go blonde.’ Is there anything that you have yet to do that you want to do? As in, living out your blonde era or if you have already have, maybe what was that blonde era like?

TANNER DEVORE: I think for me, moving in alone was the big thing that I always was like, I don’t think I could do this. I’m gonna go crazy. I’m going to be talking to myself and you do do both of those things every day. But after I lived alone, I think I kind of started viewing things like, ‘Oh, wow, I don’t have to get told what the next day is or get things decided for me. It’s all in my decision making and I think my going blonde thing, again, is to really do things that scare me and really going for the thing that gets my cortisol spiked in a good way. Whether that be performing on stages again or doing open mic or doing stand-up and trying things. I think escaping my comfort bubble I’ve built by living alone has been a big thing lately. I don’t want to not torture myself, but I want to get myself a little out of the perfect 72 degree cozy blanket, microwave meal, safe haven I built for myself. I’m ready to be scared again. I think that’s been my big word lately. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: I think that’s great too, just to challenge yourself because I really do feel like anything you try to do will be successful. I think that it will really be accepted by a lot of people. 

TANNER DEVORE: Thank you. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: In an ideal world, what do you want your future to look like? 

TANNER DEVORE: Honestly, as much as I love doing the podcast solo and doing solo sketches, I really want to jump on and support more of my friends’ projects and to go back to that collaborative style I haven’t done in so long. I just had a chance to work with the comedy department at DePaul University in Chicago and they hosted a show that’s called TTSNL. It’s basically an SNL dupe, but it’s all of these people, all of these comics, all of these friends basically working together, making wigs, costumes, writing the sketches, and doing everything. It really reminded me of all of this working alone is to figure out my voice so I can work with others. I think in what I can bring to the table in someone else’s table. I’m ready to sit at other people’s table and not just building my own table right now, if that makes sense. In an ideal world, I think it’s going to be constantly jumping from other people’s projects while investing in my own. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: I think that’s also a really great way to give back. When you grow up in a small town, it’s kind of like communicating with your younger self who might not have had TTSNL or these amazing projects where so many people are coming together to do it. I think when you grow up in a small town when you’re a creative kid, you do kind of have to create an isolation sometimes because maybe it’s not as cool as playing sports or whatever it is these places are into. 

TANNER DEVORE: Just because you have the bubble of isolation doesn’t mean that you can’t invite other people into it. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: Absolutely. 

TANNER DEVORE: That’s one thing that’s kind of been the mantra lately of it can still be the same rules and maybe you get to be really specific about who you let in and who you trust. But I think you realize that there’s other people that want a bubble of isolation like yours. And if you’ve already built it, you can let other people in and then they’ll figure out their own bubble. Not everybody spent their childhood building a safe bubble for themselves. They either felt like they were safe in day to day or they joined other people’s. I have some friends that we would always sleep over at one of our friend’s house. That was the house that we always went to and it wasn’t that we felt unsafe at our house, but it’s like you already got it figured out. You already got the snacks. You already got everything. We’re going to go stay with you. That’s how it finally feels. I’m finally saying, ‘Hey, like, I’m ready to share the snacks. I’m ready to share the blankets. I’m good. I don’t need my bubble to just be me. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: That’s amazing. So, some of the last questions I have for you are a little bit less serious. I know you love a good dog picture to express your mood especially. What dog picture would you say would describe your mood today?

TANNER DEVORE: There’s a white dog and he’s smiling and he’s gripping a flower in between his teeth.

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: That’s good!

TANNER DEVORE: He looks really goofy and his paws are very presentational. I feel like that. I’ve had a week that I feel like I’m holding a flower at the end of it. I’m feeling very gathered for once. It’s good. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: Mine that I use the most is the dachshund that’s giving the side eye. I feel like that one’s just a classic. 

TANNER DEVORE: He’s universal. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: Absolutely. 

TANNER DEVORE: All of them are he’s, too. That’s the other thing. When I find out that a meme dog is actually a girl, I feel like a bad feminist because I feel like I’ve been gender blurring every one into a male dog. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: If it makes you feel any better, I do the same thing with all animals. They made be he’s, but they’re all divas to me at the same time. 

TANNER DEVORE: Exactly. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: If you had to listen to one album and watch one movie for the rest of your life, what would you choose?

TANNER DEVORE: I have a lot of history with Sweetener by Ariana Grande, and I think it’s one of those that still sounds fresh even though it’s been out for a while. So I would say, honestly, if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. For movie, Jim Carrey The Mask has always been my comfort movie. I would just say that’s an easy watch, but it’s also exciting. I always discover something different about it every time I watch it. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: That’s always the highlight of a good movie. I actually have not watched that yet, and I know I need to. 

TANNER DEVORE: Oh, you do. You do! It’s like real life Looney Tunes. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: Who did you look up to growing up and who do you admire now?

TANNER DEVORE: I really have actually been sitting on this a lot lately, which is funny that you’re asking about it. I always feel like I need to say Oprah or like somebody really monumental and so visible like Ellen before she yelled at her secretary, but I honestly feel like my icons were always obviously like my mom and my grandma or my babysitter. I had a babysitter really late in childhood. Like, 12, 13 years old. It was crazy. I feel like just the women that I will be around that I never had to explain myself to. Those were my pioneers, my icons of growing up. Now, it’s always the stranger in the city, very much the people you meet on a night out, the people that you become super close with after hanging out two times. I’ve kind of realized that so much of growing up, I always wanted people to look up to that were there at every stage of my life and knew everything about me and I knew everything about them. Now I’m realizing I actually find comfort the other way around that they know virtually nothing. Those have been the people I’ve learned the most from lately-the people I’ve known less than a year. You don’t realize it until you’re fully in it, but I don’t care if you don’t know what high school class I didn’t do good in. I really don’t care anymore. I’m happy to just not know, you know. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: I totally get you on that. I also feel like there’s something so whimsical about going out for a night be it at a club or some small event, maybe a friend’s party, and meeting someone and just having so much fun kind of resting within that place of we don’t know each other, but this banter is amazing. We’re laughing; we’re having a great time. I can’t tell you how many times I go to concerts alone because I like it. I always make a friend and maybe I don’t ever hang out with them again or ever see them again. Sometimes I add them on Instagram, but there’s something to be said for having a great time with someone you don’t actually know that well. I find it makes you feel like how you were saying-it brings you out of your bubble and it shows you there’s a lot of great people in the world. You just have to go out into it sometimes. 

TANNER DEVORE: Instagram ruins the moment sometimes. It’s so cool that we just met tonight and just being okay with that. I mean, the reality is, even when you get the Instagram, you’re probably not going to see them again. Right? So, it’s kind of cool to just disappear. We showed up for each other when we needed it. We enjoyed the concert, we enjoyed the club, whatever and then we just disappeared after. I think that’s so cool that you could do that every time you go out and you didn’t know that the person was gonna be like at all when you showed up. It’s like, they just fell into your life. That’s such a cool thing. I also kind of talked about this on the pod recently, but I think that’s one thing that we can never imagine in dating and it’s something so easily achievable with friendship. It’s such an interesting thing to think about that we can’t just randomly run into someone, but when we are looking for friends or just open to friendship, we run into everybody. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: It is very interesting. Back to that Instagram piece, sometimes you’re on there or on Hinge looking through and my stomach drops every time they’re like, ‘Let me get your Instagram.’ I’m like, oh no. 

TANNER DEVORE: Yes, yes! It’s almost like it’s somewhere in that line between the real life connection and then the algorithm thing. I think when we make a vulnerable choice to go somewhere alone or connect with someone new, sometimes you don’t even think that it just happens, right? I’m open to it. And then they’re like, well, let’s bring it back to the phone or bring it back to that we follow each other. Well, now I’m gonna be checking if you like my picture or not. I don’t want to do that with you. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: Exactly.

TANNER DEVORE: I kick you out of that. I honestly think that’s one of the reasons why when I started dating my partner, I actually didn’t even give him my Instagram or follow each other until like date six. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: That’s great.

TANNER DEVORE: It was really, I think. It's one of the foundational pieces that helped the time, because we obviously had the discussion basics, but we didn’t have to do it for so long. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: I feel like when I get their profile too early on, I get my magnifying glass out and I look through everything. I’m overthinking things. Then you’re going into dates thinking, ‘Well, I saw this, so is this how they think about this?’ versus just sitting down with them. I watched your episode about sitting down and having a bunch of questions and just ask them. There’s nothing wrong with just going straight to the source. 

TANNER DEVORE: I think that’s that neurotypical propaganda that we’ve been fed that you’re not supposed to come there prepared to a date. Sometimes we need to prepare, and I think there’s nothing wrong with saying, ‘I do care about you enough that I want to ask these specifically worded questions.’ I mean, that’s literally what we’re doing now, but I think it opens it to connection because not everything comes easy and natural and comfortable or whatever. We’ll get to that point eventually, right? Like date number five. But, that first date I want to come in like, ‘Here’s what I want to know for real.’ I think that doing that with my friends’ dates has been a big eye opener with that.I always feel like I’m grilling them, but my friend will walk away and she’s like, ‘I never knew that about him.’ I’m like, he’s your date! How do you not ask that? I want to know. Taylor: There’s too much ambiguity. It’s nerve-racking to think you can go on so many dates with someone and be like, I’m really enjoying this. I really feel a connection. And then he could just drop a bomb that he believes in something you totally don’t believe in. 

TANNER DEVORE: Totally. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: Well, girl I could have found that out on the first date but here we are. 

TANNER DEVORE: Well, I think a lot of times we’re scared to know. They can only exist in the little bubble we created for them in our head. Like, you have to be this person or this person. That’s been one big eye opener. Like, I really thought I wanted to date a night owl or whatever, and then I’m with someone that loves staying at home. I can’t be like, well, that’s not what I wanted. No, you realize that person makes you adjust in certain ways and makes you view them differently. You know, it’s not like I can only love you because you view this this way or view the world this way. I’ve kind of opened up. Hey, I’m kind of relieved that you’re not exactly who I thought you were in a lot of ways, you know? That’s not always a bad thing. I think we sometimes act like we want to summarize people, especially who we’re dating and our friends, and it’s kind of cool when they surprise you or that they view it a different way than you thought they did. But, there’s definitely limits to that, too. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: I agree. Absolutely. I think with social media, it’s this special, complex place where it can allow you to connect to so many people, but at the same time, it can kind of put that black and white thinking where you’re summarizing people or you build up this whole idea of a person before you really even know them. So, you have to ride a fine line of how far you can let your mind jump sometimes. You have to just keep an open mind so that you don’t miss out on connecting with somebody that could mean a lot to you in life. 

TANNER DEVORE: Exactly. Yeah, I think we’ve very surprised at the people that you end up being friends with, especially as you move further into adulthood. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: Yes

TANNER DEVORE: I feel like I had such a rule book and such a boring expectation out of the people in my life. It was almost like it was a job interview. And then now I have friends for every different thing I want to do. Just because I love going out doesn’t mean I can’t have somebody that just wants to stay home with a candle. I’m grateful for that person where in the past maybe I was like, ‘Oh, I want all my friends to be party people.’ Oh my god, give me a break. It’s nice to just let people be who they are. And then, you apply them. If you need to be formulaic or calculating anything, figure out where they work. Be 100% you and then I’ll figure out where you work in my week versus this idea of well, you’re like that and I don’t know if that works. It’ll work. We have reasons for every season. We can make a connection with anybody if we try. 

TAYLOR CHAMPLIN: Absolutely. Honestly, thank you so much for taking the time to talk with me. I am so happy I got to meet you. 

Photo © Tanner Devore for One Hour Photo. Photography by Dev Bowman.